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Hi, here I am!

Shy at my core.
Former control freak.
Recovering people-pleaser.

I've been privileged enough to have the time and space to examine the mixed bag of issues/conditions/characteristics/programming that puppet my everyday life.

 

Here's what I know, what I've come across so far...

Back in the Day

I am 1/2 Kenyan and 1/2 Tanzanian, which saves me from being ALL American. Growing up a foreign black girl, in the 80's, in white American suburbia, was a unique experience (duh). I was terribly shy. I didn’t dare open my mouth or do anything that made me stick out more than I already did. 

I hated not knowing what was going to happen next. If I didn’t know or couldn’t predict, I didn’t try.

My child brain concluded I needed to take care of other’s needs to get them to like me. I spent so much time people please-ing, I didn’t know how to recognize my own wants and needs.

All the above, boil down to fear; fear of humiliation, of the unknown, of not feeling worthy enough. Challenging these fears will be a lifelong process (says every therapist!). At least now, I see the little wins: my fear is NOT always at the wheel. Sometimes, I can even stuff that bad boy in the trunk.

How did I get Fear to loosen its grip, you ask?? 

Night & Day

There are still times in my life where I revert back to my shy self.

Yet, in other areas in my life, I am sublime. I am a present, confident and formidable force. Moving to Amsterdam 20 years ago was a huge catalyst to the version of me that roams the Earth today. With time and distance, I have been able to crunch the data of all my lived years. I've analysed and anguished and managed to pull a 180°.

Here are a few things that have helped me along the way: improvisation, community, therapy, stand-up, family & friends, understanding nutrition, moving to Amsterdam, play, storytelling, interacting with different cultures, laughing, volunteering, my sister’s wisdom & guidance.

From This Day Forward

My mission is to continue challenging myself to develop further and to encourage you, your team, your loved ones to do the same.  

Previous Experience

Interactive TV Production, UPC Broadband (2007 – 2011)

Production/Post-Production, Engine Pictures, Roland House, Leopard Films (2000 - 2004)

Missile Systems Engineer, Raytheon Systems (1997 -1999)

Formal Education

Master of Arts, Film and Video (2005)
Awarded distinction in Comprehensive Exam (writing)
American University, Washington, DC, USA


Bachelor of Science, Electrical Engineering (1997)
University of Southern California, Los Angeles, CA, USA

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